The Walt Disney World Marathon was my 50th marathon. It was supposed to be a nice little fun run,
with Jim and my dog Dune meeting me at the finish. Little did I know going into this event that it was going to be a total blowout!
Let me first say that it was never my goal to run 50 marathons. When I signed up to do my first marathon back in 1994 it was my intention to run a marathon, just one marathon, and simply add it to my list of accomplishments. I never dreamed that I would go on to run many more marathons and later, ultramarathons.
There is no particular reason why Disney was my 50th race. I have treated most of my marathons as training runs for my upcoming ultramarathon races. I don't taper for these races and I don't do anything special for them. Sometimes I run with a 15 pound pack on...sometimes not. Sometimes I put in a 2 hour run before the race, sometimes not. Sometimes I will do a 3 hour run the day before, sometimes not. So my times generally don't matter to me. My best is 3:36...my slowest...5:42.
Disney just turned out to be the next race on the calendar, and coincidentally it was the 20th Anniversary of the event and so the medal was pretty nice. I drove up to Orlando the day before the race and went to the Expo to pick up my race bib. From there I checked into a hotel and Jim and I walked across the street to have supper at the Olive Garden.
For as long as I can remember I have had either spaghetti and meat sauce the night before the race, or lasagna. Sometimes I will even have a glass of red wine with it. Well, for some reason, and I have no idea why...I decided to try something different. I broke the cardinal rule of never doing something new for a race. I had a gigantic plate of chicken and shrimp carbonara with a glass of white wine. It was good! We walked back to the hotel and I watched a bit of TV and fell asleep.
Disney starts at 5am! This is a good thing because you are done early, but man, it is hard to get up at 3am for a race! I always bring my electric espresso maker with me and had two cups of coffee. It was strange because I always have a bowel movement after my coffee, but not on this day. Odd I thought.
Jim dropped me off at the Epcot entrance, and I headed off toward my corral. It is a fair walk to get there but the weather was nice this year. We all listened to the National Anthem, and watched all the fireworks go off and then we were on our way! I have done Disney three times before this....2009...2010(I did the Goofy Race and a Half Challenge...the Half-Marathon on Saturday, and the Marathon on Sunday) and 2012.
The race started off all right and then it hit me. I had to go the bathroom. I had a bowel movement coming around and I knew it wasn't going to be good. This was going to get ugly. I needed to find a bathroom right now! I was scared to death I was going to crap my pants right then and there, and it was taking all I had to hold back and pinch everything in. Finally, a port-o-potty in sight. I hopped around waiting for my turn, and then dashed inside. Explosive diarrhea. Oh my God! It was terrible. I had already broken a sweat from my run, and I had to deal with the mess of wiping my butt with toilet paper that was sticking to my sweaty hands and butt. Gross. I yanked up my tights and headed back out to the swarm of runners.
A little further down the road it hit me again. I was on the hunt again for another port-a-potty. I found one, and again, a massive burst of fluid. Damn...it was that Pasta Carbonara coming back to haunt me! As a veteran I should have known better. Once you get to the point where you have run so many races, you can begin to become a little blase about things. These marathons are just training runs for me, and so I can get a little sloppy sometimes in my preparations. It was a lesson well-learned...DO NOT DO ANYTHING NEW BEFORE A RACE! You will pay for it!!!
By mile 13 I had visited 7 port-a-potties. Toward this point, my visits were just producing little trickles, but I certainly wasn't going to take any chances. My sphincter was saying I am going to blow, and I would head to a toilet. Who wants to crap their pants in a training run? Especially in a run where there are hundreds of people passing me by now?
Okay, so now the runs are over with but I am left with a burning ring of fire. My butt is screaming by this point. And then I begin to develope cramps. Major gas pains. I didn't want to let the gas out in case something else came out with it...so I was holding everything in. My stomach was really cramping up on me, and I was bloated like you would not believe. Finally, I stopped at a medical tent and asked them if they carried any gas relieving medication. They handed me some tablets and I gratefully accepted them and popped them in my mouth. I was having some major belches for the next hour or so...it's all foggy to me now. It was just one long hurtfest.
This sights...oh yeah...there were a few. Mickey, Minnie, Donald, Goofy...yadda, yadda, yadda. I can always appreciate a beautiful trail...but interrupting my race to run over and stand in a line to get my picture taken with Mickey is not high up on my To Do list. But I did pull over to get my picture with this dude! How perfect! I love how a total stranger can make your whole day!
The finish line finally came into sight, and hey, I was starting to feel much better! I think I was ready to run another race! I hadn't pushed myself for speed and my legs weren't tired or sore. It had just ended up being a very lazy run. My final time....hold on, let me look it up...I don't even know it one week later....OKay, I just checked....4:48:42. Remember, this time reflects 7 port-a-potty breaks and a medical tent stop. I like the Age Graded time better... 4:02:11.
Pretty slow! But heck...it made for a memorable 50th! I don't usually get roses after a race, but Jim surprised me at the finish and gave me a kiss to make everything all better! And the medal was pretty darn nice too, so that helped take the edge off! That was last weekend...January 13th,2013. (I refuse to believe 13 is unlucky) I have this weekend off, and then I am registered for the Miami Marathon next weekend...January 27th. You can be sure that I will be eating LASAGNA the night before the race, and I won't be doing anything different in my routine!!!
In my next blog I will post about some of the more memorable marathons I have done over the years...the weird, the wild, the wonderful... the weather! You name it...there have been some crazy runs. I'll tell you all about it next week.
